Chapter 26

Miss Nogard sadly shook her head. "I am very disappointed in you," she said. "Not only did you vandalize the dictionary. But then you lied about it. I thought I could trust you, Maurecia. I guess I was wrong."

"I'm a horrible person," Maurecia agreed. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize to me," said Miss Nogard. "It's not my dictionary. It belongs to the class."

Maurecia had to stand in front of the class and tell them she was sorry. Then, since nobody would ever be able to use that page again, she had to read it aloud to the class.

She struggled through the difficult words like "journalism" and "judicious."

"Speak up," Miss Nogard had to keep reminding her. "And everyone needs to pay close attention because there will be a test on it when Maurecia is finished."

"Hey, that's not fair!" complained Jason. "We didn't rip the dictionary. Why should we be punished?"

"It's not punishment," said Miss Nogard. "It is for your own good. Since you can no longer use that page, you need to memorize it."

"Thanks a lot, Maurecia!" griped Jenny.

When Maurecia finished reading it, Miss Nogard
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made her turn the page over and read the back side of it too.

"But I only ripped the front," said Maurecia. "Not the back."

She finished, then returned to her seat angry and upset. She wasn't angry at Miss Nogard. Miss Nogard was just being fair, she thought

But there was only one way Miss Nogard could have known about the torn page, she realized. Somebody in the class must have seen her tear it and then tattled on her.

She looked around the room, from Deedee to Todd to Terrence to Joy. She didn't trust any of them.

One of her friends was a no-good-dirty-double-crossing-snake-in-the-grass!
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"This is a shoelace," said Mac.

Everybody laughed.

Mac was standing at the front of the room, holding his shoelace in his hand. He felt like a fool.

"What a fool!" said Allison.

It all started a minute earlier, when Miss Nogard asked, "Who has something to share for show-and-tell?"
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But first you should know something about Mac.

Mac's favorite subject in the whole world was show-and-tell. He loved it. Especially when he was the one doing the showing and telling.

He often looked through garbage cans on his way to school, in search of stuff to show and tell about. Once he found a real gushy love letter. It was covered with something that looked like peach slime. But that wasn't what made it gushy. The gushy part was what was written in the letter. Mac read it to the class with lots of feeling.

So when Miss Nogard said, "Who has something to share for show-and-tell?" Mac reacted without thinking. His arm shot up like a rocket as he almost jumped out of his seat. "Ooooh! Ooooh!" he groaned.

Then he remembered something. I didn't bring anything for show-and-tell!

Miss Nogard heard him. Before he could lower his hand, she called on him.

And that was how he ended up with his shoelace dangling from his hand like a dead worm.

"It came from my sneaker," he said. He took off his sneaker and held it up too, next to his shoelace. "See, you stick the laces through the little holes, here. Then tie it in a bow. That keeps it from falling off your foot."

"Duh!" said Dana.

"We know what a shoelace is," said Paul.

"I've been tying my shoes since I was two years old," said Joe.

Calvin and Bebe booed.

"Sit down," said Jason. "You're boring."

The kids in Mrs. Jewls's class never used to be so mean, but they'd been getting grumpier and grumpier ever since Miss Nogard took over.

"Put your shoe back on!" said Maurecia. "Your foot stinks."

Mac felt terrible.

Miss Nogard smiled. "Go on, Mac," she said. "We're all very interested to hear what you have to say."

He tried to think of some way to make a shoelace interesting. "Uh, shoelaces are real important," he said. "There was once this guy. He was a real fast runner. His name was Howard. Howard Speed! He was the fastest runner in the world! But this was back before shoelaces were invented. And so, every time Howard raced, he ran right out of his shoes!"

Nobody seemed very impressed. But then Rondi asked, "Did it hurt his feet?"
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Mac shrugged. "I guess," he said.

"I once stubbed my toe on a rock," said Stephen. "It hurt."

"Yeah, and you didn't run as fast as Howard Speed!" said Mac. "He ran so fast that if he kicked a rock, he would break his toe!"

"Did he have blisters?" asked Todd.

Mac smiled. "Man, he had the biggest blisters you ever saw in your whole life! Bleeding blisters!"

"Ooooh," Joe and John said together.

"With pus oozing out!" said Mac.

"Oh, gross!" said Dana, wide-eyed.

Everyone was paying close attention to Mac now.

"Wherever Howard went," said Mac, "he left a trail of bloody footprints."

"Cool!" said Terrence.

"And so they had to invent something to keep Howard's sneakers on his feet," said Mac. "First they just tried nailing his shoes to his feet."

"Yowza!" Bebe exclaimed.

"Why didn't he just use Velcro?" asked Jason.

"Howard lived in Africa," explained Mac. "Velcro trees only grow in Australia. So then they tried gluing his shoes to his feet. And that seemed to work. But then, whenever he took off his shoes, like to take a bath or something, he'd peel off a layer of skin."

"Yuck-ola!" shrieked Allison.

"But finally Thomas Edison invented the shoelace, and Howard never ran out of his shoes again."

"Did he win all his races after that?" asked John.

"Well," said Mac, "the next race was for the championship of the whole world. Howard got off to a real fast start. It looked like he would win for sure. But shoelaces were still a new invention, and Howard wasn't quite used to them yet. Right before he reached the finish line, his shoelace came untied. He tripped over it and fell flat on his face. He broke his nose, lost all his teeth, and had two black eyes!"

"Wow," said all three Erics together.

"So remember," said Mac, as he held his shoelace high in the air. "Never laugh at a shoelace!"

Everyone applauded.
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Eric Fry, Eric Bacon, and Eric Ovens were playing way-high-up ball. They had made up the game themselves.

All you needed were two things-a pink rubber ball, about the size of a tennis ball, and a real

tall school.

Eric Ovens threw the ball way high up. It bounced off the school, just above the third-story

window.

"Three-pointer," called Eric Bacon.

They shoved and elbowed each other out of the way as they waited for it to come down. At the last second, Eric Fry jumped and caught it.

He got three points. Eric Ovens also got three points since he was the thrower.

Eric Fry threw the ball way high up. It bounced off a window on the fifth floor.

"Five-pointer!" called Eric Ovens.

All three Erics jumped for it. It bounced off their fingertips and hit the ground.

The teacher on the fifth story stuck her head out the window. "Hey, what's going on down there?" she shouted.

The three Erics looked away and whistled.

There's one more thing about way-high-up ball I haven't told you. You're not allowed to play it. The Erics had already broken one window.

Eric Bacon looked up, surprised. "Are you talking to us?" he asked.

"Something just banged against my window," said the teacher.

"Was it a bird?" asked Eric Ovens.

The teacher stared at the children a moment longer. Then she pulled her head inside.

Eric Fry threw the ball way high up. It was a six-pointer!

All three fought for position as they waited for
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it to come down, but at the last second, a hairy arm reached above them and caught it.

The arm belonged to Louis, the yard teacher.

"Can I play?" asked Louis. His mustache had grown back completely.

"Sure!" all three Erics said together.

"What do I have to do?" asked Louis.

"Just see how high up against the school you can throw it," said Eric Fry.

Louis gripped the ball tightly in his hand. He reached way back, then let it fly.

"Wowww!" the three Erics said together as they watched the ball soar up in the air.

It hit up above the eighth-story window, then Louis caught his own rebound.

"Sixteen points!" said Eric Bacon.

"Throw it again, Louis," said Eric Ovens.

Now that Louis was playing, lots of kids from all over the playground came to play too.

Louis threw the ball way high up. It hit above the eleventh story, then bounced back over everyone's head.

There was a mad scramble for the ball. Bebe finally came up with it.

"Give it to Louis," said Eric Ovens.

"No, let Bebe throw it," said Louis, who always tried to be fair.

Bebe threw a two-pointer.

Jason caught the rebound. "You want to throw it Louis?" he asked.

"No, you go ahead," said Louis.

Jason threw a glopper.

A glopper is when the ball goes straight up in the air and comes down without touching the building.

Eric Bacon caught it. "Here, Louis," he said.

"No, you throw it," said Louis.

"But you can throw it so much higher," said Eric B.

"We want to see how high you can throw it, Louis," said Leslie.

"C'mon, Louis!" everyone urged.

Louis shook his head. "The game is for you kids, not for me."

"Miss Nogard is watching," said Bebe slyly.

Louis glanced at Miss Nogard, who was standing just outside the front door. "Give me the ball," he said.

The kids cheered.

Louis reached way down, almost to the ground, then hurled it up with all his might.

The ball reached the fifteenth floor, halfway up the school!

"Wow!" everyone said together.